update

ok, so yesterday, i said that a loooot of things has happened within the week.

it first started with the thing with paul. spending last saturday night sleeping (or pretending to be asleep) next to one another, where we ended up doing something foolish. i did'nt mind what happened, i just don't want him taking things seriously after that. it feels ackward, because sunday came and he was a little different, he just does'nt laugh as much but he stills go around throwing kick ass remarks at me.i don't know, i never imagined he would be serious about the whole thing. maybe i'm just not used to this new side of him.

anyway after that, came monday. i was hanging out at our house and was greeted by a text message from vhal, asking me if i don't have work and why am i not in my friend's bday. i was not shocked because prior to that we were already exchanging SMS already. so i SMSd him back telling him that we would be dropping by later because arnold was at the house and we are just finishing playing tong-its. he said that he really did'nt intend to go to the party but he thought that i would be there, so he came. he was a bit disaapointed to find me not there hence, texting me to drop by.

so, we arrived by around 12 am, he was still there and wasted no time in catching up with me. i just enjoyed the attention i was getting from him. i had this feeling early on that this would be a long night.

we drank even if i was scheduled for a training early next morning, i just don't want to pass the chance to get it on with him again because i was enduring 3 grueling months of celebacy already.
he kept on staring at me(because he was sitting across me in the room), and i pretended to be oblivious to the glances he was throwing my way.

i love the way he looks. it's not malicious, it's like he's seeing beyond my eyes, deep beneath my soul, to the very core of my desires.

he accompanied us on our way home, however, he asked me if we could hang out for a little more while to talk. so i agreed, and we went over a couple of things. it was really a meaningful conversation because after "the talk" i felt that we were on a more concrete ground.

he walked me home, holding my hand. when we got in front of our house, i just could not let him go without feeling him inside me again (forgive the language). i invited him in the garage because we could not do it in the house for we might wake up tita.

we kissed softly at first, passion and intensity increasing by the minute. when we could not restrain ourselves anymore, we got down and did it there. it was really unbelievable, it was so good, i almost cried (but of course, i did'nt).

we lingered there for a little more while before i let him go because it was already almost 4 am and we both have commitments at work we have to attend to that day.
he was still holding my hand and hugging me on his way out the gate, and before leaving, he kissed me on the forehead and promised to text early morning.

at that point, i was having these illusions, that we are exclusive already. is that pathetic? does it gives one the impression that you suddenly have a claim on that person just because you made love the previous night?

i don't know.

but he left, giving me that impression.

came tuesday, he texted in the morning before i left for work. i went undertime because it was keil's bday and we went swimming. before going home, i dropped by his to see him in his workplace. he greeted me with a smile and talked for a short while. he was adamant that we eat first because he very well knows, i did'nt eat breakfast. i ssured him that i was not hungry because i had a full lunch with my bunch of officemates. i told him im going ahead because people are actually waiting for me because of the outing. i was about to leave, when he ha;d my hand and told me, that he would be able to text me because he does'nt have credits at the moment. i had to fight my urge to smile. i was thinking while i was walking home, why did he have to say that when i was'nt asking him that he text me later. hhmmm...

maybe we really are exclusive...
but i still have to be sure.

wednesday, i SMSd him, and apparently, he still does'nt have credits because he did not SMSd back.

thursday...
i decided to drop by his workplace, and unfortunately he got out early and suddenly came this heavy downpour. and i was like "oh great!" by the time i got home, i was soaking wet.

i texted him.
me: huhuhu...i went by your workplace, sayang maaga ka pla nag-out. nabasa me ng ulan pro ok lang coz i hve my jacket.miss u!
him:sorry ha, di ko nman kasi alam eh,maaga kasi me nag-out, di ne me nag-ot.
sana po mgtxt k nxt time pra alm ko. sorry talaga ha! asn k na?
me: dito na me haus, pwede k ba off sa monday? sundo mo me sa office tapos kain tau.
him:sorry di me pwede mag off ng mon. kasi i hve to finish my sales report by that day ksi tues and office day ko, kailangan ko mag report sa sup ko.pro daan me dyan mga 7pm that day,ok? sorry tlaga h.mapapagltn ksi ako pag d me ngreport eh.
me:ah ganun b? ok lng pnta ka n lng dito sa bahay ngaun? kahit sandli lang, kiss mo lang me tpos uwi ka na,hehehe, miss u na eh!
him: o cige, antayin mo me h, pnta na k, now na. kaso sandali lang ha, mga 5 hrs lang, hehehe
me:ok, yehey!

shortly after that, he came and asked if he could was his feet kasi maputik. i was really overwhelmed, because i thought that he won't make time for me, hehehe, kala ko lang pla un. arnold was around again when he came and they greeted each other because they used to play in the same team during their basketball days.
he was there, holding my hand, teasing me, while we play tong-its. i really was touched by his sweetness ( ang corny ko!bwahaha!) especially when he saw that i was berefooted, he placed his feet underneath mine and said "kunwari ako ung slippers mo". i smiled. i'm sorry, but i really am a mushy person. and while speaking in low tones like most couples do around other people, i can see bhe and arnold's face, they were like sick with the sight of us like that.

hehehe, la kau magagawa, pa lovers kami eh.

apparently, sandali lang lasted for two hours. he kissed me good night and we walked them out because vhal and arnold was leaving together. i was a little apologetic to vhal because he forgot that he needed to get his hair cut because of me. well, he still was able to get it cut. i SMSd him today, so i know.

i'm looking forward to monday because we already have plans for that day.

so, what do you think? are we exclusive? do i have to ask him that? i feel really stupid for wanting answers to these questions, but i really need a verbal confirmation about this whole thing. maybe i'm just being more careful, i don't want to crash and burn again.that would be too much. too painful. too soon.

my friends tell me that, we are grown ups now. we don't have to act like high school boys and girls anymore.

maybe i'll just go with the flow...see what happens...
who know's, this time might be different...
hopefully...